37 days ago
December 13th 2008 07:08
Well 37 days is a long time to not write a thing. Finishing a course and being out dawn til dusk is what stole all the time. But I had to log back in today and get back into the habit of this as I had the most beautiful experience the other night.
Beautiful isn't the right word more of a thrill like christmas morning.
I was dazed out watching a seinfeld rerun on TV. The computer was being used and then I hate using the computer often.
(I feel like it steals the whole night and I don't do anything but search dreams and fantasy's. But then usually the TV is just as much a waste of time. Sometimes I get things done before it, other times I just stare at my fingers and toes when my mind and body are to tired from running all day to bother with much else but all that is beside the point I think)
Seinfeld had just finished and I wondered what would be on next. I was expecting something boring like the news or horrible like a late night horror movie. I was getting ready to drag myself upstairs and check my email or look up a website on places to stay in france. When I saw it and was transported. There was a sharp cry from my lips and then I quietened transfixed with glee.
I'm not sure what it was that just took me straight into the Island of the Haunted Pretender movie. I guess I've been obsessed with the series so many years and seen it all so many times that I just know (like when you know your own cars engine just by ear or rumble when not in sight) that it was on. There was the familiar framing and perhaps familiar symbols or labellings that went straight into my subconsious. The room just faded and my heart skipped a bit.
Now this probably all seems a bit over the top, I guess you can't really understand this unless you have ever been in the similar position of being an obsessed and addicted fan of a TV show. The kind who logs in online one night when the season had just finished under the influence of withdrawal symptoms and finds thousands of other sights created by people who feel the same way and is soothed by the cartharsis of Fanfic in which the show could be made to continue on and things happen you always thought should have only limited by your own imagination and trying to stick as truly to the characters as possible.
But the trouble with fanfic is it is not authenticated and when the series was abruptly axed at the end of season four with thousands of unanswered questions and some and the legacy of an unfulfilling last season that didn't really seem to make anything develop in a way I would have liked then fanfic lost it's sparkle of possibility. As there was no more show to unfold to offer the hope that any of the possibilities I imagined and other people did might unfold.
There is through the craziness of TV show obsession a bond that can be formed with other fans. Not one you know about on a personal basis. Just the comforting feeling that there are lots of other people across the world who were captured by something in this alternate reality similar to you. Something that makes them need as strongly as you for it to continue.
The Fan base for The Pretender after an age got two more movies made. Unfortunately neither of them offered any more answers or resolution. I guess they wanted to keep us hanging so they could make more but they never did. The Island of the Haunted is the final of the two movies. I actualy have every episode on tape plus the movies but I never watch them. Something about having it on TV makes it easier to watch than just on a tape you could pick up any time. So I sat glued til 2am watchin the film the other night getting completely and utterly unsettled with withdrawal symptoms again. It is satisfying to know that no matter how many times I watch it my perception of it never changes. Other favourite shows I have watched again years later and not been able to recognise what I saw. But as I could tell from those first few seconds the other night and the following hours nothing had changed. Some part of it has eternally captured my imagination and fascination They havent made anything so good since.
Beautiful isn't the right word more of a thrill like christmas morning.
I was dazed out watching a seinfeld rerun on TV. The computer was being used and then I hate using the computer often.
(I feel like it steals the whole night and I don't do anything but search dreams and fantasy's. But then usually the TV is just as much a waste of time. Sometimes I get things done before it, other times I just stare at my fingers and toes when my mind and body are to tired from running all day to bother with much else but all that is beside the point I think)
Seinfeld had just finished and I wondered what would be on next. I was expecting something boring like the news or horrible like a late night horror movie. I was getting ready to drag myself upstairs and check my email or look up a website on places to stay in france. When I saw it and was transported. There was a sharp cry from my lips and then I quietened transfixed with glee.
I'm not sure what it was that just took me straight into the Island of the Haunted Pretender movie. I guess I've been obsessed with the series so many years and seen it all so many times that I just know (like when you know your own cars engine just by ear or rumble when not in sight) that it was on. There was the familiar framing and perhaps familiar symbols or labellings that went straight into my subconsious. The room just faded and my heart skipped a bit.
Now this probably all seems a bit over the top, I guess you can't really understand this unless you have ever been in the similar position of being an obsessed and addicted fan of a TV show. The kind who logs in online one night when the season had just finished under the influence of withdrawal symptoms and finds thousands of other sights created by people who feel the same way and is soothed by the cartharsis of Fanfic in which the show could be made to continue on and things happen you always thought should have only limited by your own imagination and trying to stick as truly to the characters as possible.
But the trouble with fanfic is it is not authenticated and when the series was abruptly axed at the end of season four with thousands of unanswered questions and some and the legacy of an unfulfilling last season that didn't really seem to make anything develop in a way I would have liked then fanfic lost it's sparkle of possibility. As there was no more show to unfold to offer the hope that any of the possibilities I imagined and other people did might unfold.
There is through the craziness of TV show obsession a bond that can be formed with other fans. Not one you know about on a personal basis. Just the comforting feeling that there are lots of other people across the world who were captured by something in this alternate reality similar to you. Something that makes them need as strongly as you for it to continue.
The Fan base for The Pretender after an age got two more movies made. Unfortunately neither of them offered any more answers or resolution. I guess they wanted to keep us hanging so they could make more but they never did. The Island of the Haunted is the final of the two movies. I actualy have every episode on tape plus the movies but I never watch them. Something about having it on TV makes it easier to watch than just on a tape you could pick up any time. So I sat glued til 2am watchin the film the other night getting completely and utterly unsettled with withdrawal symptoms again. It is satisfying to know that no matter how many times I watch it my perception of it never changes. Other favourite shows I have watched again years later and not been able to recognise what I saw. But as I could tell from those first few seconds the other night and the following hours nothing had changed. Some part of it has eternally captured my imagination and fascination They havent made anything so good since.
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